I paused in my reading, “We should never give ourselves the freedom to doubt [Yahweh] or His eternal love and faithfulness toward us in everything.” I studied the sentence, who was this person? But there was no name. Challenged, I thought about times of despair, when the heart is heavy with feelings of hopelessness; times when failure and misery swamp us as we battle to pray or read Yahweh’s word. Troubled emotions weigh us down and affect our spiritual walk, and yes, we can so easily fall into doubt, wondering if Yahweh has forsaken us.
I went back to my sentence. Does the heaviness of my heart equate with me giving myself freedom to doubt Yahweh and His love and faithfulness? I ask myself. I am arrested, and I ponder! Times of heaviness and heartache come to us all; inevitably we face times when things ‘go wrong’! We don’t always deal with these very successfully, do we? I smiled as I went on to read the confession of an honest soul, “…sadness confronts me while I am on the highway of usefulness. And it stays face to face with me until my poor soul turns blue and sad! In fact, sadness discolours everything around me and produces a mental paralysis. Nothing has any appeal to me, future prospects seem clouded in darkness, and my soul loses all its aspirations and power!” Now these are sentiments I fully understand; I expect most of us will be able to relate to them! So, what can we do, how should we react?
As I mused on these two quotations, thinking how true they both are, and wondering how they could relate, Yahweh reminded me of the time my parents died. They were buried just 40 days apart, and for several months afterwards I felt I was crawling around in clouds of deep exhaustion and grief. During that time there was just one, powerful thought anchoring me, “I know and trust the One in whom I believe.” Eventually that belief brought me through to peace. Life happens! Don’t give yourself the freedom to doubt Yahweh, hold onto what you know about Him, and you will emerge into the sunshine.
Photo by geralt